Saturday, October 31, 2009
{ 12:32 AM }
heyhey ppl...
i feel like tis wk has realli seriously tire maself out fully.nd still i hav 2 make time 4 every1 as much as i cn.so tired so so tired of everyting..wish i cld close ma eye nd tat everytin wld come 2 a standstill...welll seems like nth much is gng ma way.gt the same stupid instructor tat i dun like 3 times in a row alr.nt well,eye swollen.realli too much alr.burbon seem 2 be a bit sad sad 2.dunno wats wrong.
idk y but i cant help it but those few words keep repeating in ma head.'who listens 2 u,listen 2 u 4 wat wen most of the things tat comes out of ur mouth is crap nd nonsense.'wow thank you so much i must say.i will always rmb tat.nxt time i wld jus shut up.or do nt talk 2 be abt anything serious cos it wld be no use cos all i cn give u is crap nd utter nonsense.wow feel so much of a importance person.feel useless alr.lose being socially involve.lose alot nd realli alot.2 many 2 say all out.like tis i wld rather choose 2 be a loner be by maself.take it all in,keep it nd fight it wif all the strength i have gt.
nw i realli am lost.i always dint believe in love always.all guys wanted was a beautiful curved out women who they cn show of 2 all their frenz nd be proud of or 2 satisfy their sexusal needs..but then you watch all those romance drama,movies nd novels which makes u wna believe tat thr is realli love out thr...which i cnt but keep tellin maself 2 believe in it.you said match makin was stupid nd so old fashion.nd said who does it nw.but u noe smth be4 i anyting i tld maself i wld be match made nd married off 2 whoeva ma parents or god chooses 4 mi.smth u dint noe.u said i was only happy wif ma frenz tat y we always go out wif them.so does tat mean i was nvr happy wif u??i am happy wif u.maybe tat is smth u dint noe.u hav no confidence in makin mi happy nd tat ma frenz cn shld i go on wif them instead.or find a guy who cn.buttt no...i chose u.peharps i was crazy.i choose 2 give in 2 u cos i love u.maybe its smth u dint noe.i lie 2 u at times cos i dun wan u 2 get hurt.maybe its smth u dint noe either.everytime i fight wif u,its 4 a reason,it teaches u smth.nd i dun tink u knew tat either.u hav grown since the 1st day i met u.dun tink u realise tat either.i made u understand wat gals wan nd wat u shld be nd hw 2 behave...use it properly.it is realli useful.thx u 4 all tat u hav given mi.realli appreciate it alot.anyting i will be here 4 u alritez.
back 2 mi,i guess like wat ppl say patience is a virtue nd it is worth waiting 4 love nd the rite 1.nd 4 mi i am willing 2 wait.cos i dun wan jus any guy but i wan 'the guy' 4 mi.tat special 1.
i feel like i wna leave slowly let every1 leave without a bel cos i feel they dun realli need her anymore.am so proud of wat every1 has become.like wat ma mum say y does god tak innocent ppl nd ynt tak ppl like mi.sigh nvm its ok.1 day at a time nw...jiayou k every1.god bless all of u!!!
Labels: leaving the world behind
Saturday, October 24, 2009
{ 12:57 AM }
heyhey yo all...school has been a gd wk but a lil tiring cos nt used 2 it jus yet..still hav yet adapt bak...anyway the wk has been a gr8 1.had so much of fun.nd oso i started ma driving alr...so AWESOME.anyway had a blast yst.nd i realise y i love bikes..but apparently some ppl were makin fun of mi.haha...nd i realise i am short.1st cos the pool table at bugis like half of mi but kinda like it then cannot even sit on a sp properly..then so sad i burn maself,they laughed at mi..idiots.haha...but so fun but butt a bit sore sore le...haha....movie was nice yst..felt like i was watching 2 show.1 main aur mrs khanna nd the other was a 'live' comedy show...haha...laugh til ma stomach pain.but a bit feel like a lil gal.ha...nd i wna kill sonu..toopid chacu...haha...crazy ppl.thx guys =)
peace out guys...hav fun nd enjoyz
feelin....
bel's theory:-if cn minimize the amt of regrets.
Labels: fun nd games
Monday, October 19, 2009
{ 9:22 AM }
heyhey......1st day of school kinda fun fun...like it...haha but its only the 1st day so let c how the rest of the wk go...
sigh idk wat 2 tink or say....always give in wen u r sad...i dun like c-ing some1 sad...nd i figure tat everything u r sad nd al,i tink of ways of making u happy...nd it works like everytime like magic...u tink abt it...i realli dunno wat 2 tink or say.2 say u r like all the other guys or nt...i wish i knew all the answer nd all the solutions...i jus feel wateva been happening r 4 a reason nd tat tings i say r 4 a certain purpose...if u havnt realise u have grown stronger but nt enufff...i am having probs nd i hav goals tat i wna achieve realli badly...but i am fine nd will work things out k...so yup..i jus wna.....take 1 day at a time...nd stop messing arnd anymore...i hate it....yup i gtg...tired tmr still gt school
Labels: run away
Friday, October 16, 2009
{ 9:36 AM }
wow i kinda enjoy ma week had a gr8 wk...i felt maybe mi nd kh gt closer nd gt more comfortable wif his frenz...haha.i had fun tis whole wk...school starting alr...looking 4ward 2 it..
anyway was out wif the clique 2day.day dint start off well nd i realli wanted bao bao but thing is the only 1 who knew wat happen was ma baby so tats y i wanted him wif mi.sry guys...anyway eileen was late which caused mi 2 be late.so happen threesome all arrived at the same time...haha...ate korean food then wen town 2 walk walk..then came home..help daddy cook nd made muruku haha then wen temple then met medan nd jakata relatives...saw kiran 2...she chubby chubby nw nt realli nice,she used 2 be really pretty nd beauitful it ok la 4 her.she is RICH...her life is like set...haha...saw ujjal her bro nd all,saw bunty nd kamal 2..nd other cute cute ppl...ahaha then wen expo...feet painful.wah daddy realli gangster sia.then brought kuah kuah,diva nd some other stuff 4 tmr...saw david again nd SURESHH!!!haha aft so long...then came home wen online so many diwali wishes...so happy then gt like 20 msg straight diwali msgs 2 nd still counting....omg its crazy haha....
i realli wish i was dreamin nd tat wen i wake up everything wld be hw i wish it wld be...feel like i am living in a world of fakers nd liars...i too am only a normal human being nd i only cn take it 2 a certain level the rest is up 2 u....
i realli realli care 4 u nd i wish u wld jus tok 2 me nd tell mi all nd nth but the truth i wld nt judge u but instead give u ma all.i wan nd am willing 2 go thru it all wif u.let mi help...let mi in...nd 1 thing i wan u 2 be safe and pls take care of urself..dun make mi worry...nt all things r abt winning or showing off or becoming known.
i am lost,so many tings hav had happened nd r happening i am so at a lost.i tink 4 wat ppl wna say nw i am nt bothered cos i tink i hav had enuff really...2 mi personally i tink tat karma lookin 4 mi nd tat it will be knocking on ma door sn.i do nt wish 2 do anyting wrong nd smth against ma principle.i wna settle down nd clear things up nd nt hav more regrets or more bitch shit.I JUS WNA BE HAPPY do u tink it is so much 2 ask 4.i wanna hav peace.laughing nd smiling 24/7 nd nt jus as a front.i am bo bian alr cos i jus wan those close 2 mi by ma side tats all.thks 2 all tat have been.appreciate it alot...ppl out thr i do nt wish 2 hav any grudges nd 4give mi if i did anyting ting or said anyting.
anyway gal i am so proud of u...so glad u understand nd am growing.gdgd k.continue...nd dun worry abt anything cos i will be here.
Things i dun like:guys playing girls..
lies,excuses
bel's theory:wen u do wrong or bad things or say certain stuff,dun tink no 1 is watching.cos thr is always sme1 watching nd nth wld happen nw but it will.so be careful nd beware.be good nd mind ur own business...thr is lots more 2 life.
song of the day:bewafa-Imran Khan(it has been set 2 repeat)haaha...jus love it so so much
Labels: Fool 4 u
Saturday, October 10, 2009
{ 10:31 PM }
heyhey....
so glad i had a funfun wk...realli cool nd hope nd wish the coming wk wld be as gd...
sad the movie marathon gt cancelled.but still hope thr wld be happening things gng on 4 the entire wk...wna be occupied.haha hav been busy wif diwali shoppin..so tis is jus a short update.anyway fri wen 2 night safari super duper uper FUNFUN!!!haha...love it i wna go underwater world nxt...yup hopefully cn...anyway gtg will update again sn
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
{ 7:59 AM }
heyhey....anyway,today i felt was quite interesting nd fun...idk y but i was so into the musuem..like felt is was very interesting all those facts nd tings i nvr knew.i kinda liked it...tot i wld be bored by the museum by no it was realli fascinating.it was oso a experience i nvr had.it was fun 2...taking pics looking at the history making jokes crapping.realli fruitful time i had...wna go 2 the toys museum bet u i wld be much so interested in it...yay fun fun...well hav lots of tings plan.hope everyting goes smoothly nd according 2 plans.i hope nd wish.i wna fill wif lots nd lots of think so tat i wont tink abt tings nd let ma mind go wild.but idk y...moving of the direction of being alone,quiet down.recap,i met eileen at cathay whr we plyed tap tap haha again while waiting 4 mimi ma...then made our way 2 the peranakan museum so cool i kinda lead the way haha my area ma haha... spend like 3 hrs or so at the museum then walk back 2 ma hse along the way showed mimi nd eileen the other cool tings on the way..haha yup...nice day i had...hope i hav the best last 2 wks... mimi say we cld all go malacca nxt month.like the 3 of us tgt so cool cnt wait jus hope wont get disappointed again..yup
anyway i am so so so glad 2 hav burbon arnd.cos i realise he is the cutest ting on earth 2 mi.even though he has bitten us be4 still love him alot.cos 4 the pass few days i realli emo as in,in a way whr u realli notice things...ppl smile nd laughter nd i realise burbon bring lots of joys nd all 2 ma family.he does adorable tings tat bring ur faces fr a frown 2 a smiles nd laughter..dearest lil ting.
anyway...amazingly i had NO calls fr papa,mummy or home or any msgs at all oso.OMG it was so cool. nd i came home at 7.cool i dint even say wat time i wld be back nd no 1 even knew wat time i left.like WOW...then saw jang nd rohit downstairs amazingly she rmbs mi...wow...then ate at the market..yup then came home watched tv wif FAM FAM...nw all slping oik oik time liao...left mi the dead zombie...haha...yup tmr nt sure of the plans yet...c hw ba...haha yup
adios...
bel's theory:-i tink ppl shld do wat they wish nd wan...ppl hav talked 2 them nd explain 2 them alr the rest is up 2 them whether they wish 2 change nd follow on their own nt cos ppl asked them 2 or force them.u hav a mind set of ur own,use it nd tink 4 the gd/betta.everyting is up 2 ur ownself.
song of the day:An jing-jay chou
Labels: i will slowly leave maself
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
{ 7:34 PM }
heyhey ppl....sorry havent been updating.cos am either nt in the mood of 2 busy.
anyway have had tings on since last sat well tat is at least up 2 wat i cn rmb...haha...anyway quick update.sat smths smths happen!!made mi tink so so much.as usual wen temple nd stuff...
sun suppose go silat road light diva...woke up late then had 2 mit kh.accompany him donate blood...i tink i need more time 2 overcome injections nd blood...totally gross mi out nd goosebumps..then met wc,leslie his fren,mimi at vivo...yup ate at ma shop then watch phobia 2...ok la loved the last story haha....then wen visitng 2 kinta haha...dint noe so many ppl miss mi..nd i so so miss them.all of them r so ma darlings.adorable idiots...borrowed itouch fr georgy..haha..came home gt scolded scolded lo...
mon wen 2 get ma retainers omg so hard 2 talk like seriously even Dr wee laugh at mi so sad sob sob...haha but he was nice he gt everyting pink 4 mi...haha...nice dentist...like mi short short small small 1...ahah so cute..then aft which met eileen nd michelle at serene mac to teach her then wen al azhar ate dinner wif kh nd abiel haha then ply tap tap we were like makin so much noise..aiyo i tell u like crazy ppl..haha i saying maself sia..okok...but funfun k...
then tue...daddy woke mi up at 9.get rdy everyting nd then had 2 send the guantis 2 the airport they were gng back 2 medan liao.yup so nice so cool...i wan 2 travel 2...escape...discover somewhr new nd explore.then came home wen 2 rest cos gt headache...slpt til like 4...then woke up nd everyting.wen fetch mummy.ltr on wen 2 watch wanted haha....salman getting old but nt bad still nice nice cool.quite hyper but shall go slp liao...
CHeers=)
bel's theory:-DO NOT take ur family 4 granted.you might NVR noe wen they might leave nd nvr come back.they r the 1 nd only.they will always be supporting u,so be thr 4 them.
Song of the day:-Hotel Service Room(pitbull)
Labels: guess u nvr noe, just a Friend
Thursday, October 1, 2009
{ 9:15 AM }
heyhey...
tue i wen 4 the ice cream buffet wow i loved it...i will 4eva eva love ice creams...nd key lime pie...nd waffle nd pancake...haha...cherry 2...am a gr8 kisser cos i am able 2 tie a knot wif the stick of a cherry 2 form a shape of a heart...yesss...then we walked arnd a few things I wna get...haha...anyway came bak home talked 2 kh dunno whether it is exactly enuff...maybe its jus mi...i dunno wat 2 say or hw 2 say...anyway paretns caught us...wed dint wan 2 go out...decided jus stay home nd tink stuff thru tats wen tears found it way 2 mi.decide 2 distract myself thru housework.maade the beds,sweep the floor,cleaned the kitchen ,wash nd scrubed the shove area nd all mass cleaning haha...then decided go listening music nd let it out yup...then wen fetch mummy...then wanted go fetch some medan guanti fr the airport daddy say i tak so long...anyway then was watching tv wif kiran wen he left go somewhr suddenly aft a call wanted follow him but he disappear so fast so decided go skating instead but 2 skate 2 novena but papa called mi halfway alr so had 2 come bak at the same time tink ma wheels giving way alr...sad sad...haha anyway wen 2 fetch ma baby fr school 2day...surprise him cos he tot i was still locked up at home haha then wen al azhar 2 eat then met olivia yup...shopped arnd a bit then left 2 home...gt of at newton nd decided 2 walk the long way home...yup reached home,parents ask mi go down walk walk nd get some tings so yup.....
well these few days hav nt been the best.actulli its been quite sometime alr hav nt been the best of moods but jus wna hide it all....keep it all hidden away shove under the carpet.no one 2 ask abt it or 2 speak of it...dun wna say or tok abt it.i wna jus watch it pass be4 ma eye,wide waken.upset...in need of liquid nd puffs 2 keep mi stable afraid i wld fall of scale nd crumple 2 the grounds.if i cld i wna run away far far away or 2 somewhr up up nd above...i dunno wat 2 tink anymore nd i dun wish 2 fight it anymore.i wna live life up,live it 2 the fullest nd enjoy maself nd always being full of joy nd laughter nd smilez nt only 4 show but 4 real...tink is i dun care alr realli cos am nt afraid of being alone being diff...wna be wat i wna be...wat affects mi is wat ma parents say...nd they mean the world 2 mi.
2 all ma sweeties out thr i am alritez dun worry k...thx 4 ur concern lately.love u guys all soso much...i will always be arnd,always thr...peace out!
Bel's theory:-sometimes parents do nt always give u wat u wan bcoz they wan u 2 work hard 4 it.nd they do nt always provide u wif everything u wan bcoz it pushes u 2 thrive in life,2 do well nd make the best of urself.
Not every1 is as lucky as others...neither did we chose 2 be like tat it was jus set upon us nd we jus gt 2 live by it.
song of the day-Avril lavigne-Get over it(love love the song lyrics realli meaningful)
Labels: u flirty rotted hound
